On that day, I went to the coffee shop and got My Friends to kill some time. However, when I saw a conversation among friends, I was amazed. Most of the people I used to assume I would spend my entire life with were now separated by time and circumstances. Also, I sometimes ponder who the friend really is to me. But after pondering for a while, I became hollow inside as if all hope had disappeared.
My Friends tells the story of several ordinary people revolving around friendship at different stages of their lives. The book has no exciting plot. Most of it describes trivial moments in daily life, for example, an unkept promise for a party, a thought that’s retracted before being spoken, and an argument that one wants to resolve but ultimately can’t. With simple, understated prose, the author shows how small cracks in interpersonal relationships gradually deepen over time. It also touches on the occasional reconciliation and relief, but more than that, it evokes a sense of helplessness. In fact, everyone cherishes their friends in their own way, but often, because they don’t know what the other person really needs, they grow further apart.
However, there is an uncomplicated sentence in the book that instantly captured me: “Some days, when you think that people lead an unequivocal life, you realize that nothing is as wonderful as you imagined. You cannot tell what other people will do, nor can you anticipate what will befall you. You never know what your ‘friends’ require of you. You simply… do your best to honor and love them.”
That was when I understood that friends aren’t eternal either. They won’t stay with you through all your best times; they won’t remain with you eternally either. They just float with time, travel with you in your different paths, gradually change until eventually, the two people just float apart from each other without even realizing it.
Maybe I’m so busy that I don’t even have time to make a phone call. It’s not that I don’t want to call, but that I forget after being busy. When I think of it later, I feel there is nothing to say. It may also be that an apology rises to my lips but I swallow it back. I feel embarrassed and think the other person should understand. As a result, things drag on like this until, in the end, there is no need to say anything at all.
I had never thought carefully before: behind those small distances, how many unspoken regrets were hidden at first, stuck in my heart, heavy and oppressive. The characters in the book can slowly understand each other and gradually repair those cracks, but my good friends those unresolved knots, those unrepaired regrets: may never have a chance to be fixed in this life.
This kind of regret is something I can neither speak out nor swallow down.
My Friends is not the kind of light-hearted story that warms the heart after reading. It is not for healing, but to dig out the broken emotions hidden under the surface of friendship. There is unspeakable loneliness, unresolved misunderstandings, and occasional relief when misunderstandings are cleared up, but more than that, there is the helplessness of having to let go, which weighs heavily on one’s heart. I didn’t understand until I finished reading it: friendship is not meant to accompany you forever. It is more like an episode on our respective paths of growth, full of twists and turns. We have to slowly learn to understand and gradually accept each other’s changes. Time just slips away like this, yet there is nothing we can do.
The personalities of the characters in the book seem to come straight out of my life. Everyone has their own distinct traits. Joel always hides his inner loneliness with a smile. Ellie looks tough, but in fact her heart is very soft. Ted does not talk much on the surface, but he is more perceptive than anyone else inwardly. Jinjin is very determined and has been clinging to her dreams, yet sometimes she is too stubborn. They are not just characters in a book; they are just like my friends in real life. Every time I see their joys and sorrows, I cannot help but think of my own friends.
Like them, we are busy and rushing forward with our own concerns. When we stop, we realize that what we should cherish and be grateful for are those who have always been by our side.